If you’re having a hard time breastfeeding, let me start with this—don’t give up.
I gave birth to my daughter at 32 weeks, and breastfeeding a preemie is honestly one of the hardest things you can go through as a mom. They’re smaller, more fragile, and sometimes have a harder time latching (although that wasn’t the issue for my little one). On top of that, when they spend time in an incubator, breastfeeding isn’t always an option right away.
There were so many challenges, so many moments of frustration, and honestly… a lot of tears (from both of us). But after a lot of trial and error, research, and just pure determination, we finally started to get the hang of it.
So I want to share some tips with you—not from a textbook, but from real experience—in hopes that it makes things a little easier or helps you work through something you’re struggling with.
Tip #1: Bond With Your Baby
Never, ever lose that connection with your baby.
There was a point where I stopped seeing feeding as bonding time and started seeing it as just another task; just feeding her so she wouldn’t be hungry. And I can tell you right now, that shift made everything harder.
Put your phone down. Turn off the TV. Just focus on your baby. Look at them, hold them, feel that connection that only a mother and baby have.
Skin-to-skin time is huge. Before feedings, during feedings, after feedings—any chance you get. Will your partner think you’ve lost it a little? Maybe. But there is nothing that boosted my supply more or helped my baby feed better than that closeness.
Tip #2: Use All Available Tools
And no, I don’t mean tools like hammers and screwdrivers—I mean breastfeeding tools.
There are so many things out there now that can help with common problems like nipple pain, latch issues, inverted nipples, or low supply.
Some things I personally swear by when feeding a preemie: nipple cream, nipple shields/soft shells, breast pumps, and lactation cookies.
My favorite nipple cream was Lansinoh 100% lanolin—it’s thick, but it works so well. When my daughter had trouble latching or my nipples just weren’t cooperating (yes, that’s a thing), Medela soft shells and nipple shields made a huge difference.
Having a pump is also incredibly helpful. Some people are very brand-loyal, but honestly, the biggest difference is electric vs. manual. Electric pumps are usually more efficient, but both have their place.
And lactation cookies… I fully stand by them. I honestly feel like my supply would’ve dried up without them. I personally love MilkMakers oatmeal chocolate chip cookies—they taste good and actually helped. But if you prefer homemade, there are tons of recipes out there.
Tip #3: Pump, when you need to.
Pumps don’t have to be super expensive, and there are programs out there that can help you get one free or at a reduced cost.
If you’re always with your baby, you may not need to pump much. But if you’re a working mom like me, pumping becomes your best friend.
I’ve used both an electric pump (Pumpables Genie Advanced) and a hand pump (Medela Harmony). Most of the time, the electric pump works better—but there were definitely times the hand pump got milk out when the electric one didn’t.
Hand pumps are also way more convenient when you’re out—they fit in your bag and don’t require an outlet.
If you’re ever away from your baby longer than their normal feeding time, pumping is so important. It’s the best way to keep your supply up when you’re not physically with them.
Tip #4: Timing is Everything
You’ll probably hear people say things like “keep your baby on a schedule” or “feed every ___ hours.”
Honestly? I say forget that.
If you’ve ever had a newborn (or any child under 5), you already know schedules don’t always work. Feed your baby when they’re hungry.
It might not be convenient, but feeding on demand is one of the best things you can do for your supply. Your baby is what tells your body how much milk to make.
If they want to eat every hour, let them. Every time they latch and feed, it signals your body to produce more milk. It really is that simple.
Tip #5: Keep Clean and Stay Fresh
This one is pretty straightforward.
Just like you wouldn’t want to eat off a dirty plate, your baby doesn’t want to feed from unclean breasts.
You don’t have to overcomplicate it—just keep things clean. A quick rinse or wipe when needed, changing nursing pads often, and staying on top of basic hygiene makes a big difference.
And yes… showers. I know it’s hard with kids, but do your best.
Tip #6: Ditch the Bottle (When You Can)
This was a big struggle for us.
Because my daughter was in the NICU and I also had a 4-year-old at home, I couldn’t be there for every feeding. She got used to the bottle pretty quickly, and transitioning her to the breast was not easy.
For a while, I had to use a nipple shield every time. Sometimes she still preferred the bottle, which can turn into a real challenge.
There was one day she completely refused the breast—and I made the decision to not offer the bottle.
That hour and a half was rough. There was crying, screaming, kicking… all of it. But I held my ground. And eventually, she latched.
Babies won’t starve themselves. If breastfeeding is your goal, keep offering the breast first.
And if you do use bottles, I highly recommend slow-flow nipples. The mōmi bottle worked best for us—the flow felt closest to breastfeeding compared to other brands I tried.
Tip #7: Ask for Help
Do not be afraid to ask for help.
Seriously—don’t let pride or embarrassment stop you. There are no stupid questions when it comes to feeding your baby.
I would not be where I am today if I hadn’t asked questions and accepted help. Lactation consultants, nurses, other moms—lean on them.
Tip #8: Don’t Give Up
There were so many moments I wanted to quit.
Breastfeeding is hard. It’s emotional, exhausting, and sometimes discouraging. But most challenges do have solutions, you just might have to work through them.
Don’t give up after one or two hard days. Give yourself time to figure it out.
Tip #9: Supplement If You Need To
If you’ve tried everything and your baby still won’t breastfeed, that’s okay.
Formula exists for a reason. While it’s not identical to breastmilk, it still provides what your baby needs to grow and be healthy.
If you can pump, you can always combine breastmilk with formula. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing.
And remember—every little bit helps.
Whether you breastfeed for a day, a week, or a month, it still matters. It still counts.
I hope this helps some of you, and maybe even encourages you to keep going when it feels really hard.
From Birth To Breast 
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